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Monday, January 17, 2005

Booze Booze Booze

Well, the birthday went well, although it started off ominously, I was supposed to be going to a "Happy Hour" at work. Now, I realise that the concept of a "Happy Hour" at work is a contradiction in terms, however they were selling drinks at 50p a go (about 27c for those on the wrong side of the Atlantic). Further, there really are some lovely young ladies who work on the otherside of the building... I arrive - and they have run out of booze. Oh No! The Bioinformaticians got there first and drank everything (they are kept locked in a dungeon most of the time and only let out if they promise not to talk about Linux or how Apple Macs are better than PCs). I tried whining "but its my birthday", however the girl in charge of the drinks stall was either a heartless bitch, or we had indeed run out of booze.

Of to the pub then. This went better, with everyone feeling compelled to buy me beer until they all turned blurry. Naturally, on the way home I decided to stop by Tesco and buy some more flour to try and make some Pizza bases again. I fell into bed at 11pm, resolving to get up again in an hour to start cooking.

8am the following morning, I awoke with a headache and the dry tongue one associates with either licking several hundred of those new adhesive stamps - or just perhaps drinking 6 pints of Carlsberg Export then night before. I had resolved however to make those bases and besides, my flat still looked like I had been subletting to the local travelers community (thats Pikeys, Gypos or Thieving Bastards to the less politically correct of you).

After 4 hours of cooking, cleaning and tidying, my flat was positively gleaming and suffused with the pleasant aroma of lightly cooked bread and industrial strength bleach. My parents and grandmother duly arrived and commented "it's a bit better than last time". My mild irritation soon turned to joy, however, when I was presented with several birthday cards containing pieces of paper with the Queen's head on them, that I am told I can swap for beer. Even better, I got a digital camera! WooHoo!

After a leisurely meal with my parents (the serving staff were leisurely - we were bloody starving) we returned to my humble abode so I could prepare for the party. I had spent a long time choosing the nibbles etc, but really the piece de resistance was the crate of lager I'd bought from Sainsbury. I figured, as long as there was music and beer the party was guaranteed to go well, what with most of my guests being Kiwis. And that it did. Between us we sank 2 bottles of wine each and most of the crate of beer. The fun really started however when a friend, fresh back from Eastern Europe, produced several thousand bootleg MP3s. Fantastic! Name that tune seems much more fun after so much alcohol. Finally 4 am rolled around and it was time for beddy byes. The flat was back to its usual state and my second hangover in 24 hours was kicking in. Even better I had managed not to kill any of my friends with my cooking. This is not an idle boast, one of my guests was described by a Harley Street specialist as "the most allergic individual I have ever met". He left at 3.30 with a decided wobble in his step, but no apparent difficulties breathing.


Stay tuned - tomorrow I will be unveiling my homage to



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