Sunday, September 11, 2005
Like pies round shit.What is it with Greggs Pasties? Are they trying to be the McDonalds of the pastry world? There has been an explosion of these little blue and orange havens of filo pastry. Now don't get me wrong - I am a big pasty fan. And of all the high street chains, Greggs do by far the best and cheapest (don't believe me? Go to Three Cooks or Hamptons, you could grease an engine with your fingers after eating one of their monstrosities). If it's a choice between some over-priced lump of dead cow and soggy fries, and one of Greggs' delicious cheese and onion or vegetable concotions, for 65 pence each I'm saving my money and going for the pies. My sole criticism is their decision to drop their cornish pasties (then pick them up, run them under the tap an sell them boom! boom!). I loved them (yes, yes I know that they are nothing compared to the real thing, but I'm about 300 miles north of Cornwall so they'll do).
Nevertheless, it seems that you can't walk more than 50 paces without being confronted by one. At the current rate of growth, I estimate that by the 2012 Olympics, we'll be such a nation of pie eaters that we'll have to petition the IOC to let in sumo wrestling for us to have any chance of winning any medals.
FOR YOUR PERUSAL