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Tuesday, April 25, 2006

The Tuesday Twat(s)

No. 60. Orange women.

OK, what gives? Every where I go, there are bright orange women clinging to their summer tan tighter than Paul McCartney to his Scouse accent. Surely, as science marches forward the chemicals that they use are supposed to get better, not worse? Yet this year's latest shade seems more fake than ever before. Perhaps there is a new budget brand that you can buy from the Pound shop? Or perhaps they are all being sponsored by a certain well-known Mobile phone company? In these skin-cancer concious times the bright pink of T-Mobile or the dangerous red of Vodafone is out obviously. Not quite sure where that leaves the blue of O2 though.

Maybe skin colouration is subject to the whims of fashion
"This season, Judith Chalmers is the new David Dickinson".

Living in a multi-cultural city as I do, I have met people with pretty much every skin shade evolution has come up with, yet this peculiar shade of orange still seems wierd. Now I know how remote tribes must have felt centuries ago, upon seeing the first white Missionaries as they came ashore bringing their gifts of christian fundamentalism, sexual repression and measles.




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