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Tuesday, December 05, 2006

The Tuesday Twat(s)

No. 78. Darren.

I have no idea who Darren is. We have never met. He doesn't even know my name. But I know his.

Darren is a popular bloke, with many friends. Unfortunately, few of those friends mean enough to him to warrant being given his new mobile phone number. They still have his old mobile number. Now MY mobile number.

Last week was his birthday. For two days between 8am and 10pm I fielded call after call, wishing Darren a happy birthday. I am sorry to say, but I got progressively less polite as time wore on.

"I'm sorry, this is no longer Darren's number. I got this number 2 months ago."

"This isn't Darren's number anymore. Could you do me a favour. If you track him down, could you please ask him to let his friends know his new number".

"No, this isn't Darren. Tell him to tell people his new number".

"Darren's dead".




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